I had my ex over for dinner tonight and we took the kids for a short scooter ride. While we were out, we got talking about how much we appreciate the different things we do for the kids. I like that he takes the kids to the park, for bike and scooter rides, is very clean and somehow gets my daughter to do lots of reading. I told him that sometimes I feel like shit because it feels like he is the better parent. He said that I am the parent who lets them paint themselves with glitter, and dry up all the playdoh making statues. He likes that I let the kids be so creative and although they completely trash my house, they get to do a lot of cool, fun things that he wouldn’t be down with.
My daughter loves it at her dad’s because they have a playroom. She loves it here because sometimes I fall asleep putting them to bed and she gets tons of snuggle time. I think we are happier now that we are apart. At least now, we never ever fight in front of the kids. Things are definitely harder and more exhausting being apart, but in some ways more relaxed. I used to apologize every day because the kids would make a mess and I suck at staying on top of keeping things clean. We eat a lot more leftovers these days. Tonight I made homemade pasta sauce and you can sure bet that’s what dinner is the next two days. For lunches, today I cut up a pineapple, a brick of cheese and a turkey kielbasa, so that will be offered. If I am feeling motivated, I may make sandwiches.
I’m just glad they have both of us in their lives. Maybe it can’t be quantified who is the better parent. It is all about perspective and priorities.